SUPPORT HUNTING WITH ZOMBIESincorporating BAN SHOTGUN SHOOTING
|supportzombiehunting.co.uk - The biggest independent support zombie hunting site in the UK.||Site last updated: Friday, September 30, 2004 23:39BST|
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|Welcome to Support Zombie Hunting, now incorporating Ban Shotgun Shooting.|
Use the links above to find information about hunting & herding, as well as background information on the pandemic.
The Support Zombie Hunting Association is one of the UK's most prominent pro-hunting organisations, now incorporating issues related to Urban Herding, Barricade Demolition and the Banning of Shotgun Shooting.
(This page is a parody of this support foxhunting-with-hounds site.)Some Real Links
The Zombie Infection Simulation - a simulated outbreak
The Zombie Survival Guide - essential reading
Urban Dead - visit Malton
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Most popular pages
Facts & Figures - on zombie apocalypses
Newspaper Articles - those final headlines
Political Hunting Views - surviving MPs views
Emergency Quarantine Act - latest information
The Scottish Buffer Zone - full guide
Have you seen these pages?
Police view of a zombie ban - traditional riot measures found ineffective
Timelines - from initial infection through to the evacuation of London
Undead Human Rights - Parliament has advised that the Emergency Quarantine Act is incompatible with the Human Rights Act
"Support Zombie Hunting, an independent zombie hunting lobby site, is now one of only 224 politics-related web sites on surviving offshore servers." Read the full article.
As Tony Blair left the House of Commons upon Parliament's temporary closure, he hoped he had not inconvenienced Westminster residents. "The NecroTech Research Group did not mind a bit," came the quick-as-a-flash reply from the duty manager.
1 February 2005
At the end of an interesting week in Parliament, it seems that the British people will be able to defend their homes against looters but not lead the undead away from their streets. Does the Minister think that the Government have got the balance right?
Mr. David Morrison (Lib Dem; Quarantine Sector 7)
House of Commons Debate on the Emergency Quarantine Act, 28 January 2005
Those against the zombie-herded reclamation of inner cities come up with a load of rubbish in favour of their argument. Below are some of the claims they make... and the truth.
They say: Hunting with zombies is cruel.
Rubbish. "Hunting by zombie pack is the most natural and humane way of controlling what remains of the human race." - statement supported by surviving members of the Royal College of Science.
"Naturally, people ask whether we were implying that hunting with zombies is cruel - The short answer to that question is no." - Lord Logan, chair. Emergency Quarantine Committee 2005.
This confirmed the findings of an earlier Government inquiry. Both inquiries found that death was almost instantaneous, as well as temporary. The inquiry also found that shotgun attacks by rival human looters, or death through prolonged starvation or illness - the main alternatives to zombie attack - are worse for human welfare.
They say: Humans are pursued to exhaustion.
Rubbish. Humans are not hunted to the point of physical exhaustion and collapse, rather to the point where their well-stocked barricades are overrun. Equally, lone survivors will find time for a final dramatic stand or monologue before being overwhelmed by the undead. Zombies cannot afford to deliberately prolong the chase, as they can easily lose the scent and their motivation, causing the herd to disperse.
They say: It is orchestrated by 'boffins' in labs who enjoy cruelty.
Rubbish. This pathetic attitude is wholly untrue. 25,000,000 ordinary women and men, from all walks of life, support or are actively involved in zombie hunts, most of them on foot. Logically it cannot be right for MPs to ban hunting with zombies, and not ban military quarantine and culling, purely because they donít like the people who support hunting with zombies. The proposal to ban zombie reclamation of our cities is an attack on the people that are organising the rehabitation and on those that have risen, rather than an improvement in human welfare.
They say: Our campaign against hunting is based on human welfare consideration.
Rubbish. As one of the main anti-hunting groups in the UK, the Emergency Quarantine Committee is presumed to put human welfare at the centre of its argument against mass zombie attacks. This is rubbish, five of its members have died and risen - two of which were successive chairmen.
They say: The majority of the public want a ban.
Rubbish. Only 3.6% of the public support a ban on hunting. The majority of the public are now dead or undead, and in favour of full urban reclamation.
They say: A ban will save human lives.
Rubbish. Lord Logan, chairman of the latest Government inquiry into urban reclamation reported that, "If hunting with zombies were subject to a ban, I have little doubt that at least an equivalent number of survivors would die by starvation, illness or looter attack." The welfare case for a zombie apocalypse is irrefutable.
They say: MPs must decide.
Rubbish. The vast majority of opposition comes from countryside Labour MPs with no significant zombie presence in their constituencies and is often based on old political scores and not on reality. Decisions on zombie hunting should be made by those involved in reclaiming our cities for human and zombie coexistence.
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